pandemic ptsd

Pandemic PTSD

Undefeated - 3:14
Panic attacks in the dentist car park,
Losing my temper in a Jersey sports bar –
Safe to say the twenties have been weird.
Dazed and confused in the morning after
A two year slow motion human disaster,
T-shirt slogans to cover over the lockdown gut and the fear.

It’s not just you and it’s not just me:
It’s Pandemic PTSD.

I’m haunted by a kind of mourning
For the life that we left in 2019.
I know it wasn’t perfect, but it’s what I knew.
Physically distanced, told we’re in it together,
But socially removed from our snickering betters,
Far too smart to abase themselves by following their own rules.

It’s not just you and it’s not just me
That has pandemic PTSD.

Post traumatic stress disorder
Is characterised by persistent trauma
Caused by severe psychological shock or else physical injury.
And maybe I’m just being melodramatic,
But I didn’t use to be this agoraphobic
Or paralysed by decisions but also crushed by inactivity.

And right about now some arsehole’s going to say
That it’s OK not to be OK.
But we’re way past that, and the conversation isn’t done,
And I won’t keep calm, I won’t carry on
Until it’s OK to admit that I don’t know how to feel
About the shit that we just lived through – it was kind of a big deal.

And one day it seemed like everybody decided
They were tired of trying and bored of hiding it,
Ready for the next adventure, next news cycle, next catastrophe.
And we stood in the wreckage trying not to claim
That we had more than our fair share of the pain,
But we got punched in the dick for two straight years
And we can’t move on that easily.

It might not be you,
But god knows its us
That’s still black and blue,
Bleeding in the dust.
So I’ll level with you
If you’ll bear with me
And my pandemic PTSD.

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